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  Captain Comics October 31, 2021 at 2:17pm

  If you haven't seen this ad, the premise is a bunch of teenagers, in what is obviously a slasher movie, running from a guy in a horror-movie mask. I think it's four teens, and they always suggest to each other the Dumbest Things You Can Do in a Horror Movie, which they all think are great ideas. Except for one reasonable girl, who is the audience substitute. The others shoot her idea down, even though it's the smart choice.

  My wife and I still quote this commercial, and when it comes on, we stop to laugh at it again. Like most commercials, there's a "main" commercial, and then shorter ones cut to fit time slots. (I'm sure there are industry terms better than what I'm using, but I don't know them.)

  Anyway, when they cut the "main" one down to fit 30 seconds, or 15 seconds, or whatever, inevitably what they cut out are the funniest/best lines, because what they have to keep is name-checking the product and the narrator's remarks. The funny lines don't carry necessary information, so out they go.

  I mention this, because if you haven't seen the longest version, you haven't heard the best lines.

  You almost always hear, "Let's hide behind the chains saws!" Which is funny.

  Sometimes you hear the exchange, "Let's hide in the attic!" or "No, the basement!" Which is pretty funny.

  But the funniest line is when Reasonable Girl says, "Why can't we just get in the running car?" And sure enough, the camera pans to a car nearby with the engine running. They could jump in and drive to safety without even the "Will it start?" drama.

  To which one of the boys responds, "Are you crazy?"

  It ends, most times, with non-reasonable girl shouting "Run for the cemetery!"

  It just cracks us up every time.

  Sometimes we invent our own lines to add to the show. "Let's split up!" or "Let's look in all the closets!" I'm sure your household could come up with more.