Avengers Assemble #1 Reactions (SPOILERS!)

First, as is my custom, here are some irrelevant images to provide spoiler space:

We begin with the Red Skull's daughter, Sin, slaughtering some archaeologists in Germany in order to steal the helmet of Eirda, the Greek goddess of hate. I would've thought that a Nazi would've gone after something more "Nordic", but whatever. Not sure what a Greek artifact is doing in Germany, but I suoppose it's possible.
We next cut to Captain America (Steve Rogers) and Jarvis in Avengers Mansion. (Didn't Jarvis die? Wasn't the Mansion destroyed?) They are discussing something called the "Avengers Emergency Response Squad". Isn't responding to emergencies just what the Avengers do? Did I miss a run of Avengers comics where they responded to non-emergencies? Jarvis calls Steve "Captain Rogers", which feels new. Didn't Jarvis always just call him "Captain America"?
The first members of the new squad arrive: Janet Van Dyne, Monica Rambeau and Shang-Chi. Shang-Chi has magic rings now, which is new to me.
Cap's Kooky Quartet 2.0 goes off to Germany to battle Sin. Meanwhile, the Serpent Society is using the distraction of the Avengers/Sin battle to steal a plot device from a nearby museum. (Doesn't Germany have its own heroes? What happened to Blitzkrieg and Captain Germany?)
Shang-Chi to Sin: "Come get this ass-kicking." OK, I get that we may not want Shang-Chi in 2024 talking like Kwai Chang Caine circa fifty yesrs ago, but this still feels like a somewhat out-of-character way for him to express himself.
Meanwhile, Hawkeye (Clint Barton) has arrived at the Mansion. I've never liked this character. I always felt thst his "obnoxious jerk" routine would've gotten him kicked off any team he was on. I would've vastly preferred Kate Bishop.
Next to arrive is Living Lightning, a character that I know nothing about.
Then comes She-Hulk, who is apparently over the business of Clint trying to murder her cousin back in Civil War II.
Next is Lightspeed (Julie Power) who says that "Captain Rogers said we needed some fresh perspectives". Isn't she like twelve? Aren't there any "fresh perspectives" that won't get them brought up on child endangerment charges? Wasn't there even an "event" about this sort of thing a few years ago?
Hercules and Wonder Man show up (Boy, they're really loading this team up with "powerhouses, aren't they?) and they all sit down to play poker.
Meanwhile, back at the battle, Jan flies up Sin's nose and and stings her from inside her own head, which I would think would kill her instantly, but what do I know? They defeat Sin by having Monica hit her with Cap's shield at light speed,which should probably destroy Sin, and possibly Europe as well, but again, what do I do know?
Back at the Mansion, Jennifer tells Simon that because she's a lawyer and he's a movie star, she can always tell when he's bluffing. Hercules then says that because of something called the "Allspeak", he can understand body language, and so can tell when people are bluffing. I think they're both full of crap, myself.
Night Thrasher (another character that I know nothing about) shows up with special team jackets for everyone.
We end with the reveal that the Serpent Scoiety has abandoned Set for Mephisto. OK.
Next: The Red Ghost and his Super-Apes invade Massachusetts. I may have to buy this to see how inaccurately they portray my home state.

Overall: This was OK. The line-up does kind of feel like "a bunch of popular characters and a bunch of characters that were sitting around not doing much", though.

We begin with the Red Skull's daughter, Sin, slaughtering some archaeologists in Germany in order to steal the helmet of Eirda, the Greek goddess of hate. I would've thought that a Nazi would've gone after something more "Nordic", but whatever. Not sure what a Greek artifact is doing in Germany, but I suoppose it's possible.

The famous bust of Nefertiti is in a German museum (and Egypt wants it back.)

We next cut to Captain America (Steve Rogers) and Jarvis in Avengers Mansion. (Didn't Jarvis die? Wasn't the Mansion destroyed?) They are discussing something called the "Avengers Emergency Response Squad". Isn't responding to emergencies just what the Avengers do? Did I miss a run of Avengers comics where they responded to non-emergencies?

We discussed this somewhere else. I can't say from first-person experience, but apparently the main Avengers team was largely taken out of the "Blood Hunt" fight early on, and Cap's ad hoc team was more responsible for saving the day. From that, they decided they needed a super-emergency team. "There cae a day, a day like no other, when Marvel wanted to increase its sales ..."

Jarvis calls Steve "Captain Rogers", which feels new. Didn't Jarvis always just call him "Captain America"?

I remember that various government and military people began calling Captain America “Captain Rogers” about 20 or 30 years ago, but I couldn’t tell you exactly when. I don’t remember Jarvis doing it, but I don’t remember him NOT doing it either. The point is, Rogers has been established as a captain in the U.S. Army. Retired or reserve, I would imagine.

The first members of the new squad arrive: Janet Van Dyne, Monica Rambeau and Shang-Chi. Shang-Chi has magic rings now, which is new to me.

That happened in the Shang-Chi movie. Evidently, the tail has wagged the dog again.

Cap's Kooky Quartet 2.0 goes off to Germany to battle Sin. Meanwhile, the Serpent Society is using the distraction of the Avengers/Sin battle to steal a plot device from a nearby museum. (Doesn't Germany have its own heroes? What happened to Blitzkrieg and Captain Germany)

American superheroes just do what they please, apparently. Over at DC, Amanda Waller has neutralized EVERYBODY’S superheroes, without so much as a how-de-do. A recent issue showed her telling the Chinese to behave or else. I honestly can’t imagine Xi or Putin being Waller’s poodles, even in private.

Where were we?

Shang-Chi to Sin: "Come get this ass-kicking." OK, I get that we may not want Shang-Chi in 2024 talking like Kwai Chang Caine circa fifty years ago, but this still feels like a somewhat out-of-character way for him to express himself.

Agreed.

Meanwhile, Hawkeye (Clint Barton) has arrived at the Mansion. I've never liked this character. I always felt thst his "obnoxious jerk" routine would've gotten him kicked off any team he was on. I would've vastly preferred Kate Bishop.

He hasn’t done the “obnoxious jerk” routine in a long time. He was a Boy Scout in Avengers West Coast, emulating his eye-deel, Captain America. That was really boring so Matt Fraction re-wrote him to be a good-hearted dope (but extremely competent fighter) that everyone felt sorry for.

Now, Quicksilver, on the other hand …

Next to arrive is Living Lightning, a character that I know nothing about.

He’s Hispanic. That’s not an observation, I think he was created to BE Hispanic and then immediately ignored. El Aguila wasn’t cutting it in the diversity department, I guess.

Then comes She-Hulk, who is apparently over the business of Clint trying to murder her cousin back in Civil War II.

And Captain Marvel and Iron Man were at each other’s throats (or so I hear) in Civil War II, and that seems to have vanished, as well. Fine, I say. Mopee the whole damn thing, I say.

Next is Lightspeed (Julie Power) who says that "Captain Rogers said we needed some fresh perspectives". Isn't she like twelve? Aren't there any "fresh perspectives" that won't get them brought up on child endangerment charges? Wasn't there even an "event" about this sort of thing a few years ago?

That was my first question, but I read an interview that establishes she’s now in college. My first thought after thatwas “where’s her older brother and why isn't he Avenging?” and then I thought, “oh, wait, he’s not a cute, blonde lesbian” and went on about my day.

Hercules and Wonder Man show up (Boy, they're really loading this team up with "powerhouses, aren't they?) and they all sit down to play poker.

The last time I saw Wonder Man, he was leading a team of ex-Avengers and ex-supervillains with some weird philosophy that it was the existence of the Avengers that was causing all the problems in the world and they needed to be killed. It didn’t make sense to me even at the time, and I guess that’s been memory-holed, too.

Meanwhile, back at the battle, Jan flies up Sin's nose and and stings her from inside her own head, which I would think would kill her instantly, but what do I know? They defeat Sin by having Monica hit her with Cap's shield at light speed,which should probably destroy Sin, and possibly Europe as well, but again, what do I do know?

Evidently Sin can take a lot of punishment. I didn’t even know she had superpowers.

Back at the Mansion, Jennifer tells Simon that because she's a lawyer and he's a movie star, she can always tell when he's bluffing. Hercules then says that because of something called the "Allspeak", he can understand body language, and so can tell when people are bluffing. I think they're both full of crap, myself.

Sounds like trash talk.

Night Thrasher (another character that I know nothing about) shows up with special team jackets for everyone.

I still think “Night Thrasher” sounds like an embarrassing medical condition.

We end with the reveal that the Serpent Society has abandoned Set for Mephisto. OK.

Does that mean they need a new name? Devil’s Disciples? Hell’s Angels? Oh, wait …

Next: The Red Ghost and his Super-Apes invade Massachusetts. I may have to buy this to see how inaccurately they portray my home state.

Also, to see intelligent apes.

Overall: This was OK. The line-up does kind of feel like "a bunch of popular characters and a bunch of characters that were sitting around not doing much", though.

Sounds about right.

Replies

Jeff of Earth-J September 15, 2024 at 1:24pm

Intersting. Not the comic necessarily (which I have not read) but your comments. You should post this sort of thing more often.
Captain Comics September 15, 2024 at 4:35pm

We begin with the Red Skull's daughter, Sin, slaughtering some archaeologists in Germany in order to steal the helmet of Eirda, the Greek goddess of hate. I would've thought that a Nazi would've gone after something more "Nordic", but whatever. Not sure what a Greek artifact is doing in Germany, but I suoppose it's possible.

The famous bust of Nefertiti is in a German museum (and Egypt wants it back.)

We next cut to Captain America (Steve Rogers) and Jarvis in Avengers Mansion. (Didn't Jarvis die? Wasn't the Mansion destroyed?) They are discussing something called the "Avengers Emergency Response Squad". Isn't responding to emergencies just what the Avengers do? Did I miss a run of Avengers comics where they responded to non-emergencies?

We discussed this somewhere else. I can't say from first-person experience, but apparently the main Avengers team was largely taken out of the "Blood Hunt" fight early on, and Cap's ad hoc team was more responsible for saving the day. From that, they decided they needed a super-emergency team. "There cae a day, a day like no other, when Marvel wanted to increase its sales ..."

Jarvis calls Steve "Captain Rogers", which feels new. Didn't Jarvis always just call him "Captain America"?

I remember that various government and military people began calling Captain America “Captain Rogers” about 20 or 30 years ago, but I couldn’t tell you exactly when. I don’t remember Jarvis doing it, but I don’t remember him NOT doing it either. The point is, Rogers has been established as a captain in the U.S. Army. Retired or reserve, I would imagine.

The first members of the new squad arrive: Janet Van Dyne, Monica Rambeau and Shang-Chi. Shang-Chi has magic rings now, which is new to me.

That happened in the Shang-Chi movie. Evidently, the tail has wagged the dog again.

Cap's Kooky Quartet 2.0 goes off to Germany to battle Sin. Meanwhile, the Serpent Society is using the distraction of the Avengers/Sin battle to steal a plot device from a nearby museum. (Doesn't Germany have its own heroes? What happened to Blitzkrieg and Captain Germany)

American superheroes just do what they please, apparently. Over at DC, Amanda Waller has neutralized EVERYBODY’S superheroes, without so much as a how-de-do. A recent issue showed her telling the Chinese to behave or else. I honestly can’t imagine Xi or Putin being Waller’s poodles, even in private.

Where were we?

Shang-Chi to Sin: "Come get this ass-kicking." OK, I get that we may not want Shang-Chi in 2024 talking like Kwai Chang Caine circa fifty years ago, but this still feels like a somewhat out-of-character way for him to express himself.

Agreed.

Meanwhile, Hawkeye (Clint Barton) has arrived at the Mansion. I've never liked this character. I always felt thst his "obnoxious jerk" routine would've gotten him kicked off any team he was on. I would've vastly preferred Kate Bishop.

He hasn’t done the “obnoxious jerk” routine in a long time. He was a Boy Scout in Avengers West Coast, emulating his eye-deel, Captain America. That was really boring so Matt Fraction re-wrote him to be a good-hearted dope (but extremely competent fighter) that everyone felt sorry for.

Now, Quicksilver, on the other hand …

Next to arrive is Living Lightning, a character that I know nothing about.

He’s Hispanic. That’s not an observation, I think he was created to BE Hispanic and then immediately ignored. El Aguila wasn’t cutting it in the diversity department, I guess.

Then comes She-Hulk, who is apparently over the business of Clint trying to murder her cousin back in Civil War II.

And Captain Marvel and Iron Man were at each other’s throats (or so I hear) in Civil War II, and that seems to have vanished, as well. Fine, I say. Mopee the whole damn thing, I say.

Next is Lightspeed (Julie Power) who says that "Captain Rogers said we needed some fresh perspectives". Isn't she like twelve? Aren't there any "fresh perspectives" that won't get them brought up on child endangerment charges? Wasn't there even an "event" about this sort of thing a few years ago?

That was my first question, but I read an interview that establishes she’s now in college. My first thought after thatwas “where’s her older brother and why isn't he Avenging?” and then I thought, “oh, wait, he’s not a cute, blonde lesbian” and went on about my day.

Hercules and Wonder Man show up (Boy, they're really loading this team up with "powerhouses, aren't they?) and they all sit down to play poker.

The last time I saw Wonder Man, he was leading a team of ex-Avengers and ex-supervillains with some weird philosophy that it was the existence of the Avengers that was causing all the problems in the world and they needed to be killed. It didn’t make sense to me even at the time, and I guess that’s been memory-holed, too.

Meanwhile, back at the battle, Jan flies up Sin's nose and and stings her from inside her own head, which I would think would kill her instantly, but what do I know? They defeat Sin by having Monica hit her with Cap's shield at light speed,which should probably destroy Sin, and possibly Europe as well, but again, what do I do know?

Evidently Sin can take a lot of punishment. I didn’t even know she had superpowers.

Back at the Mansion, Jennifer tells Simon that because she's a lawyer and he's a movie star, she can always tell when he's bluffing. Hercules then says that because of something called the "Allspeak", he can understand body language, and so can tell when people are bluffing. I think they're both full of crap, myself.

Sounds like trash talk.

Night Thrasher (another character that I know nothing about) shows up with special team jackets for everyone.

I still think “Night Thrasher” sounds like an embarrassing medical condition.

We end with the reveal that the Serpent Society has abandoned Set for Mephisto. OK.

Does that mean they need a new name? Devil’s Disciples? Hell’s Angels? Oh, wait …

Next: The Red Ghost and his Super-Apes invade Massachusetts. I may have to buy this to see how inaccurately they portray my home state.

Also, to see intelligent apes.

Overall: This was OK. The line-up does kind of feel like "a bunch of popular characters and a bunch of characters that were sitting around not doing much", though.

Sounds about right.
- The Baron > Captain Comics September 15, 2024 at 4:57pm
  
  It may just've been that Julie Power looked like a kid standing next to She-Hulk.
  
  The rationale with the Serpent Society is that Mephisto was the original "serpent in the Garden", so they don't have to change their name.
Jeff of Earth-J September 15, 2024 at 5:13pm

I remember that various government and military people began calling Captain America “Captain Rogers” about 20 or 30 years ago

That long ago? I was thninking it was around the time of "Heroic Age" (circa 2010) when Bucky Barnes was Captain America and Steve Rogers was referred to as America's "Top Cop."

Now, Quicksilver, on the other hand …

...not to mention Wolverine...

I read an interview that establishes she’s now in college.

John Byrne established the conceit that characters (such as the Blonde Phantom) age "off camera."

(Julie Powers is a lesbian now? OK.)

This reply was deleted.