Saw a Takashi Miike picture called The Great Yokai War. "Yokai" is a Japanese term for monsters from folklore, as opposed to the more familiar kaiju. It's a kids' picture, about a young boy from Tokyo sent out to live in the countryside with his older sister and his intermittently senile grandfather. When a vengeful spirit appears, the boy gets caught up in a war between warring groups of yokai and must find his courage to become the "Kirin Rider", the hero who will set everything to rights. It's not a bad picture - nothing deep, but an amusing story. Some of the yokai are really trippy, Japanese folklore can get pretty "out there", apparently.
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TERROR IN THE JUNGLE (1968): "A plane flying over the Amazon crashes int ot he untamed jungle, killing everyone on board except for a young boy who was travelling alone to visit his mother. A tribe of natives discovers the boy and brings him to their village, where they revere him due to his golden hair. As the high priest plans to sacrifice the lad in order to appease the god worshipped by the natives, the boy's father desperately searches the jungle for him."
Where do I even begin with this one? I often read the capsule summary before watching the film because otherwise there are times we would have no idea what was supposed to be happening. I wish we hadn't this time, though, because it gave away the fact in advance that everyone else aboard the plane dies. Given that, it's surprising so much time was devoted to introducing and developing the passengers considering the plane crashed 25 minutes in. Let's see... there is pop group aboard that looks like three fourths of the Monkees (Mike, Mickey and Peter). They even sing a song before the plane goes down ("Soft Lips"). They are all carrying guitars (no cases), yet there is clearly a drum set being played somewhere. there are two nuns traveling with a dead nun in a coffin. The coffin is stood up in the passenger cabin because apparently there's no cargo hold. There's an actress who's trying to attract a rich businessman. There's a woman who has just been acquitted for murdering her husband. (She's carrying a suitcase full of her husband's cash.) One of the nuns (the one who gave her newspaper to the murderess) fell out the open door.
The plane gets in trouble so the pilot flys to a lower altitude so the flight attendants can open up the door and start tossing out the passengers' carry-on luggage to lighten the load. The plane crashes into the Amazon River and approximately half of the passengers are killed on impact. The stews start handing out life-jacts and start pushing the surviving passengers out the door before the plane sinks. Did you know that the collective noun for a group of crocodiles is a "bask" if it's on land and a "float" if it's in water? In any case, a bask of crocs becomes a float, at a 1:1 ration crocs to surviving passengers. The stews, however, dump the dead nun out of her casket and put the boy in it like a boat. That's how he survives.
The natives tick off every box: Headhunters? Check. Cannibals? Check. Darts and blowguns? Check. Sunworshippers? Check. A Busby-Berkely style dance number on the steps of an Aztec pyramind is a hilight of the film. The kid is carrying a stuffed animal that looks a lot like Mr. Rogers' Daniel Tiger, but in the end it's more like Calvin's Hobbes (seriously). This is one of those movies that is so bad it's good, and I really can't recommend it highly enough.
I can't find a trailer, but the entire film is available on YouTube.
THE SKYDIVERS (1963) "The owner of a skydiving business finds his life and his livelihood in jeopardy all due to his affair with another woman. The mistress becomes jealous of the owner's wife and plots to bring his business and marriage to ruin. With his own wife also cheating on him, the owner's actions bring him ever closer to danger!"
A few corrections. First of all, the husband and wife are co-owners of the skydiving business (she flies the planes and skydives, too). Second, his affair was brief and ended shortly after the movie began. Third, the wife didn't cheat on him. The husband was a paratrooper in Korea and decide to put his skills to good use upon his return and opened a skydivuing business to cash in on the fad. His war buddy arrives and does, at one point, kiss the wife (offscreen), but he wasn't making a play for her or anything like that. The "girlfriend," Suzy, is a psychopath, and her drunken boyfriend was fired from the school. Suzy is played by Marcia Knight, who has been in other movies I've seen including The Beast of Yucca Flats and Stanley (the snake movie). The movies isn't great, but it at least tries to be good. It's very "philosophical" (in a kind of "Ed Wood" way, but not so stream of consciousness), but most of the acting (primarily among the extras, of which there are many) is comically wooden. There's also a "roack and roll" band which plays two numbers at the big night jump which closes out the film. If this movie cut out all of the skydiving scenes it would be a half hour shorter, easily.
The Baron > Jeff of Earth-JAugust 1, 2023 at 5:48am
Skydivers was one of three Coleman Francis movies featured on Mystery Science Theater 3000 (Show 609), along with The Beast of Yucca Flats (Show 621) and Red Zone Cuba (Show 619). Francis was a terrible director. I always say that anyone who says that Ed Wood was the worst director ever has never seen a Coleman Francis movie. If there is a Hell, then film-lovers that get sent there are forced to watch Coleman Francis movies or all eternity. I cannot imagine watching an un-MSTed version of this.
I didn't know The Skydivers was MST3Ked but, now that you've pointed it out, I looked it up in the Amazing Colossal Episode Guide. Speaking in my own defense, it does point out that The Skydivers is the best of Coleman Francis's three. It also points out some things I noticed, but glossed over (the Scotsman, the "buxom giantess," the girl on roller skates, the guy with the guitar, etc.) I even mentioned "Chekov's guitar" in anticipation of the guy actually playing it, but he never does. In retrospect, the Black girl in the bikini (whom I also noticed) now brings up some rather disturbing social/societal implications.
I asked Tracy this morning if she would mind watching the MST3K version. she replied, "That's the risk we run when watching Crown International Pictures." She also asked whether or not MST3K made a running joke out of how relentlessy awful CIP's movies are. I don't know; did they? That's another point in my defense, BTW: we have been watching a lot of CIP movies lately, which make The Skydivers look good in comparison. I the A.C. episode guide, Mike points out, "There's never been a better movie for our treatment." I respectfully disagree. I would dearly love to see an MST3K version of Terror in the Jungle.
"No, they're all there, I just haven't gotten around to posting a link to it yet, because I'm a lazy, unfocused bastard."
I found it. (It's on p. 28.) You said:
Show 609: "The Skydivers", first broadcast 8/27/1994
The Short: "Why Study Industrial Arts" (1956) sells students on the advantages of studying the industrial arts. A fine example of 1950's film-making.
The Film: From 1963, lust and murder in the world of sky-diving, from Coleman Francis. The main story is hard to follow, but there are occasional weird characters in the background that are mildly amusing.
The Host Segments: Tom Servo puts on a planetarium show, but Crow keeps asking about Uranus. Dr. F challenges mike and the Bots to a swing choir contest. Frank declares the Mads the winners,leading Dr. F to do an extremely odd victory dance. Crow saws himself in half doing his shop project. Later, he puts himself in a double jock lock. Servo strafes Crow's car. Crow and Servo are stuck in their parachutes. Dr. F throws balls at Frank because Frank is a "puss".
Rating: A fun outing. The film is insane, and the host segments are amusing.
"I cannot imagine watching an un-MSTed version of this."
What about watching it two nights in a row, one straight and one MSTed, because that's what we did. (The best friend did kiss the wife onscreen, BTW, it just happened so fast last night I missed it.) This was a particularly good MST3K, though, I must admit. Tracy and I made the same "coffee" jokes Mike and the 'bots did, plus they really skewered the ending, which I neglected to mention last night. The couple who sabotaged the parachute were guilty, but the posse tracked them down and killed them (from a car and a plane), on the basis of one eyewitness, a teenager, who saw them in the vicinity of the hanger.
I liked the short, too; I pretty much always like the shorts.
Replies
TERROR IN THE JUNGLE (1968): "A plane flying over the Amazon crashes int ot he untamed jungle, killing everyone on board except for a young boy who was travelling alone to visit his mother. A tribe of natives discovers the boy and brings him to their village, where they revere him due to his golden hair. As the high priest plans to sacrifice the lad in order to appease the god worshipped by the natives, the boy's father desperately searches the jungle for him."
Where do I even begin with this one? I often read the capsule summary before watching the film because otherwise there are times we would have no idea what was supposed to be happening. I wish we hadn't this time, though, because it gave away the fact in advance that everyone else aboard the plane dies. Given that, it's surprising so much time was devoted to introducing and developing the passengers considering the plane crashed 25 minutes in. Let's see... there is pop group aboard that looks like three fourths of the Monkees (Mike, Mickey and Peter). They even sing a song before the plane goes down ("Soft Lips"). They are all carrying guitars (no cases), yet there is clearly a drum set being played somewhere. there are two nuns traveling with a dead nun in a coffin. The coffin is stood up in the passenger cabin because apparently there's no cargo hold. There's an actress who's trying to attract a rich businessman. There's a woman who has just been acquitted for murdering her husband. (She's carrying a suitcase full of her husband's cash.) One of the nuns (the one who gave her newspaper to the murderess) fell out the open door.
The plane gets in trouble so the pilot flys to a lower altitude so the flight attendants can open up the door and start tossing out the passengers' carry-on luggage to lighten the load. The plane crashes into the Amazon River and approximately half of the passengers are killed on impact. The stews start handing out life-jacts and start pushing the surviving passengers out the door before the plane sinks. Did you know that the collective noun for a group of crocodiles is a "bask" if it's on land and a "float" if it's in water? In any case, a bask of crocs becomes a float, at a 1:1 ration crocs to surviving passengers. The stews, however, dump the dead nun out of her casket and put the boy in it like a boat. That's how he survives.
The natives tick off every box: Headhunters? Check. Cannibals? Check. Darts and blowguns? Check. Sunworshippers? Check. A Busby-Berkely style dance number on the steps of an Aztec pyramind is a hilight of the film. The kid is carrying a stuffed animal that looks a lot like Mr. Rogers' Daniel Tiger, but in the end it's more like Calvin's Hobbes (seriously). This is one of those movies that is so bad it's good, and I really can't recommend it highly enough.
I can't find a trailer, but the entire film is available on YouTube.
Here's a clip of the song "SOFT LIPS".
THE SKYDIVERS (1963) "The owner of a skydiving business finds his life and his livelihood in jeopardy all due to his affair with another woman. The mistress becomes jealous of the owner's wife and plots to bring his business and marriage to ruin. With his own wife also cheating on him, the owner's actions bring him ever closer to danger!"
A few corrections. First of all, the husband and wife are co-owners of the skydiving business (she flies the planes and skydives, too). Second, his affair was brief and ended shortly after the movie began. Third, the wife didn't cheat on him. The husband was a paratrooper in Korea and decide to put his skills to good use upon his return and opened a skydivuing business to cash in on the fad. His war buddy arrives and does, at one point, kiss the wife (offscreen), but he wasn't making a play for her or anything like that. The "girlfriend," Suzy, is a psychopath, and her drunken boyfriend was fired from the school. Suzy is played by Marcia Knight, who has been in other movies I've seen including The Beast of Yucca Flats and Stanley (the snake movie). The movies isn't great, but it at least tries to be good. It's very "philosophical" (in a kind of "Ed Wood" way, but not so stream of consciousness), but most of the acting (primarily among the extras, of which there are many) is comically wooden. There's also a "roack and roll" band which plays two numbers at the big night jump which closes out the film. If this movie cut out all of the skydiving scenes it would be a half hour shorter, easily.
TRAILER.
Skydivers was one of three Coleman Francis movies featured on Mystery Science Theater 3000 (Show 609), along with The Beast of Yucca Flats (Show 621) and Red Zone Cuba (Show 619). Francis was a terrible director. I always say that anyone who says that Ed Wood was the worst director ever has never seen a Coleman Francis movie. If there is a Hell, then film-lovers that get sent there are forced to watch Coleman Francis movies or all eternity. I cannot imagine watching an un-MSTed version of this.
I didn't think it was that bad. We're definitely going to have to seek out that MST3K version, though.
I see Show #609 is not highlighted in your index. Does that mean it's not reviewed?
I see Show #609 is not highlighted in your index. Does that mean it's not reviewed?
No, they're all there, I just haven't gotten around to posting a link to it yet, because I'm a lazy, unfocused bastard.
It's going to be a while before I can post the link. I'm finding the search engine on the new site to be useless.
I didn't know The Skydivers was MST3Ked but, now that you've pointed it out, I looked it up in the Amazing Colossal Episode Guide. Speaking in my own defense, it does point out that The Skydivers is the best of Coleman Francis's three. It also points out some things I noticed, but glossed over (the Scotsman, the "buxom giantess," the girl on roller skates, the guy with the guitar, etc.) I even mentioned "Chekov's guitar" in anticipation of the guy actually playing it, but he never does. In retrospect, the Black girl in the bikini (whom I also noticed) now brings up some rather disturbing social/societal implications.
I asked Tracy this morning if she would mind watching the MST3K version. she replied, "That's the risk we run when watching Crown International Pictures." She also asked whether or not MST3K made a running joke out of how relentlessy awful CIP's movies are. I don't know; did they? That's another point in my defense, BTW: we have been watching a lot of CIP movies lately, which make The Skydivers look good in comparison. I the A.C. episode guide, Mike points out, "There's never been a better movie for our treatment." I respectfully disagree. I would dearly love to see an MST3K version of Terror in the Jungle.
"No, they're all there, I just haven't gotten around to posting a link to it yet, because I'm a lazy, unfocused bastard."
I found it. (It's on p. 28.) You said:
Show 609: "The Skydivers", first broadcast 8/27/1994
The Short: "Why Study Industrial Arts" (1956) sells students on the advantages of studying the industrial arts. A fine example of 1950's film-making.
The Film: From 1963, lust and murder in the world of sky-diving, from Coleman Francis. The main story is hard to follow, but there are occasional weird characters in the background that are mildly amusing.
The Host Segments: Tom Servo puts on a planetarium show, but Crow keeps asking about Uranus. Dr. F challenges mike and the Bots to a swing choir contest. Frank declares the Mads the winners,leading Dr. F to do an extremely odd victory dance. Crow saws himself in half doing his shop project. Later, he puts himself in a double jock lock. Servo strafes Crow's car. Crow and Servo are stuck in their parachutes. Dr. F throws balls at Frank because Frank is a "puss".
Rating: A fun outing. The film is insane, and the host segments are amusing.
Bob and I were discussing the terrible dialog. Jeff and I made fun of it throughout the movie. It was an easy movie to roast.
"I cannot imagine watching an un-MSTed version of this."
What about watching it two nights in a row, one straight and one MSTed, because that's what we did. (The best friend did kiss the wife onscreen, BTW, it just happened so fast last night I missed it.) This was a particularly good MST3K, though, I must admit. Tracy and I made the same "coffee" jokes Mike and the 'bots did, plus they really skewered the ending, which I neglected to mention last night. The couple who sabotaged the parachute were guilty, but the posse tracked them down and killed them (from a car and a plane), on the basis of one eyewitness, a teenager, who saw them in the vicinity of the hanger.
I liked the short, too; I pretty much always like the shorts.
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