PROJECT CRYPTID #1 (OF 6)
Story: Grant Morrison, Mark Russell, Paul Cornell
Art: P. J. Holden, Jordi Perez, Jon Proctor
Ahoy Comics, Mature, $3.99
Anthologies can be hit or miss, and that is the case here.
The first story is "Ballroom of Death," by writer Mark Russell and artist Jordi Pérez. It involves an unpleasant rich guy climbing Mt. Everest, and insisting to his reluctant guides that they take the potentially lethal route to the top, the titular Ballroom of Death, instead of the easier, less lethal route. The Sherpas (I assume that's what they are) warn him often enough that the foreshadowing is inescapable. And yes, something bad happens.
It is funny, darkly. Which made me smile, wryly.
That's not the only good bit; the story is efficiently told, with just enough information to sketch out the three main characters perfectly. Any more would have been excess, so I consider the storytelling deft.
I'm not as pleased with the art, which is sufficient to tell the story but not ready for prime time. I can see why the excellent story pushed this effort to the front, but the mediocre art could put some readers off.
The second story is "Wormy and Me," by writer Paul Cornell and artist P.J. Holden. It involves an American soldier whose life is saved by a heretofore-unknown (by me, anyway) legendary Mongolian Death Worm in the, ahem, "Kurjitatakistanabad" desert. I suspect this two-foot sandworm isn't an actual legend of any kind, but is simply made up for this story. It's poisonous and can generate lethal electricity, and supposedly the inspiration for the much bigger variety of sandworm in Dune.
Hmm. Well, it's not important for the story whether it's a "real" legend or not. The upshot is that the American adopts the worm and takes it back to the U.S., where he becomes an LAPD officer assigned to the cryptid squad. We go on for a few more mildly amusing pages before we get to the climax, which I might have seen coming if I had been more engaged in the story.
The tl;dr is that the art is far better here, but the story is a bit of a shaggy dog. There is an actual pay-off (unlike most shaggy-dog stories) but it took too long to get there, with a lot of unnecessary but not unpleasant bits and bobs that I guess are supposed to be funny, but mostly seemed incidental. Your mileage may vary, as humor often does.
Lastly, we have The All Star Annually Convening Cozy Detective Club starring in "Partially Naked Came the Corpse Part 1," a prose story by Grant Morrison with illustrations by Jon Proctor.
This is not a serious Morrision effort, or maybe it's a seriously comic effort. Anyway, Morrison tells the story with all the finesse and restraint of a waterfall, with a torrent of rich verbiage that is simulaneously evocative and preposterous. But as you plow through all the words, what comes into focus is a parody of drawing-room detectives of "bloodless" crimes like Nick and Nora Charles. (There are others, but I'm not sufficiently well read in this genre to ID them.) His protagonist, who is auditioning for the All Star Annually Convening Cozy Detective Club, is a McCloud-like detective (from a different U.S. state every time his residence is mentioned) nicknamed the Rhinestone Cowboy. I don't mean to imply that the character is specifically a McCloud parody; he could just be representive of all cowboy detectives. Or maybe Morrison is a Glen Campbell fan.
Anyway, despite seven pages of this stuff, I can't say yet whether I like it or not. Morrison is clearly having a ball indulging in editor-free verbosity and demonstrating his facility with pop-culture references (not all of which I understood), but as a reader I occasionally felt the need to impatiently skip over all the meaningless logorrhea and go on to find some element that was actually pertinent to the story. Such as it is.
Despite my complaints, I'm not exactly repelled; it is Morrison after all, and I assume a payoff down the road. I'm inclined to keep reading until I become fully engrossed or turned off altogether -- either outcome having equal chances at this point.
Jon Proctor is not an artist with which I am familiar. His art is dazzlingly slick and detailed, while at the same time vaguely off-putting, as if the entire panel was awash in an oil slick. Again, I could either end up embracing this style or rejecting it out of hand. Which means, I guess, I have to keep reading to find out.
Replies
I neglected to pre-order Project: Cryptid, and my LCS didn't get any for the shelf (which is unusual for my LCS but not, I have learned, for other comics shops in the area). I have a primary shop and a secondary shop, and any number of tertiary shops I use as back-up. The last time I missed an AHOY! comic, I spent the day driving to all of them (about six or seven total) and was totally gobsmacked to learn none but two had even heard of AHOY! Comics. So this time I limited my search to those two stores, but no joy. Just 30 minutes ago I got off the phone to Travis's shop, which is pretty far away from where I live. They had had a few copies, but by now they're all gone. ARRGH! If only I'd've gone on Wednesday! I've got the first issue on re-order at my LCS, but it may take "a couple of weeks" if it comes at all. Last time this happened, I had to resort to mail order.
AHOY! Comics is currently my favorite comic book publisher. It's the only company whose products I buy 100%. There may be a week I don't buy a Marvel or a DC, but there's rarely a week I don't buy an AHOY! Comics comic. (They usually ship one a week most weeks.) Each issue contains usually two prose features, most often short stories but also such diverse fare as poems or even recipes. Sometimes science articles. (Our own Rob Stager has had several of his stories published.) You know the stories comic books used to run to qualify for lower postage rates before they realized they could accomplish the same purpose by running letters pages? Thinking of those old prose stories, AHOY!'s raison d'etre for pulishing prose every issue is, "What if those stories were good?" (Also, FYI, "AHOY" is an acronym but I don't really understand it so I won't repeat it here.)
From your description of Project: Cryptid #1, Cap, it sounds a lot like their Edgar Allan Poe anthologies, which are also, admittedly, "hit or miss." There are some series I like more than others, obviously, but even if the comic book story in a given series/issue is not one of my favorites, one of the short stories (which can also be hit or miss) will usually save it. the bottom line is, I have never bought an AHOY! Comic I didn't find something to like about. You didn't mention it in your review, but the Grant Morrison story is the opening chapter in a "round robin" designed to celebrate AHOY! Comics' fifth anniversary; other writers will continue the story he started.
Thanks for posting this particular review.
Prompted by your comment, I looked up the AHOY acronym. Its original meaning makes plenty of sense, while the current one is just making do.
The original one is that one that didn't make sense to me (but I never heard the story behind it).
I've never before heard the current meaning.
It always makes me think of THIS SONG.
I remember the first time I saw a Beach Boys album cover and being surprised that they weren't all blond. Still am, I think.
Today I bought Con & On #3 (which was supposed to ship last week) and Black's Myth #4, both of which ran a "Now On Sale" house ad for Project: Cryptid #1 just to taunt me. They contain the second and third chapters (respectively) of "Partially Naked Came the Corpse!," neither of which I can read because I haven't read the first chapter yet. For the record, though, here's the publishing schedule (enlarged from Cap's initial post).
I've got Chapter 1, but have yet to get to the comic shop for chapters 2 & 3! I'm especially psyched for Chapter 8 -- Audrey is a good friend, and the kid of a couple of my best friends!
It turns out that the Mongolian Death Worm is a real* thing (unlike the Kurjitatakistanabad desert; it's said to inhabit the Gobi). The first description of it was in 1922, according to Wikipedia.
*a real, previously existing cryptid, that is -- which may or may not be real in the way a whale or a tiger is.
I finally (Finally!) got a copy of Project: Cryptid #1. I agree with your assessment that "anthologies can be hit or miss, and that is the case here," and I also agree that Mark Russell's is the better of the two stories presented here. (Disclaimer: I am a big fan of his and a sucker for pretty much everything he writes.) I also went ahead and read issue #2, with a story of a Chupacabra which mates with a Chihuahua producing a Chupahuahua (an ending telepgraphed by the story's title), and a story of an ivory-billed woodpecker.
My personal favorite cryptid is the redundantly-named "Momo the Monster," which was a popular topic of conversation when I was in elementary school. I didn't belive in such things at the time, but I didn't necessarily not believe in them, either. But Momo was another matter. It was first sighted by a little girl in Louisiana, Mo. and, from the very first time I saw a drawing of it, I knew all she did was describe Warner Brothers' Gossamer.
Even years later, long after the girl admitted she made the whole thing up, sightings persisted.
Now I've got six installments of "Partially Naked Came the Corpse!" to catch up on.
PARTIALLY NAKED CAME THE CORPSE!:
If anyone is interested in my opinion of the first installment of this round robin story, simply read Cap's review above; he pretty much sums up my thoughts exactly. (I was going to quote a line or two from Cap's post, but I'd end up reposting the entire thing.) What Morrison does here is to introduce a large cast of bizarre characters (suspects), and then end with a murder. (I was going to quote a paragraph or two from Morrison's "torrent of rich verbiage that is simulaneously evocative and preposterous," but I really couldn't decide upon a single paragraph.) After reading the first installment, I felt sorry for whoever had to follow him immediately (Bryce Ingman). If it were me, would I attempt to develop the "plot" (such as it is) that Morrison established? I certainly could not emulate his "with all the finesse and restraint of a waterfall" technique. What Ingman does in the second installment is brilliant in its simplicity: he shifts POV to another character.
Here's the story so far (six installments in): Slim Jim "James" Toledo--the Rhinestone Detective--attends his first meeting of the Cozy Detectives Club, only to be stunned when the head of uppercrust sleuth The Gent lights up and melts into an electronically enhanced puddle of gore with a cheap transmitter in its mouth. Canine crume-buster Barker snatches up the head in his mouth, stunning his telepathic partner the Blonde--who turns urgently to Slim Jim Toledo with an ominous warning: "They're all robots!" While Barker and the Blonde deal with the head itself, Slim Jim Toledo sets out to find the killer. He tracks him to a ren faire famed for the forging of deadly weapons. "Come with me if you want to live," he heard a woman say...
To be continued...
Glad you finally got Cryptid #1, Jeff. Halleluah! I'll be interested in seeing what you and others have to say about "Partially Naked Came the Corpse," since it's unlikely I'll make the effort to find all the parts and read them in order.
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