From Dynamic Forces
May 15, 2012
WARNER BROS. CONSUMER PRODUCTS ANNOUNCES ICONIC IMAGES BRANDED ON TOASTERS ONLY FROM DYNAMIC FORCES IN 2012
Runnemede, NJ - Dynamic Forces is proud to announce our newest license with Warner Bros. Consumer Products for a line of collector toasters!
The new toaster collection will showcase iconic imagery featuring Warner Bros. properties ranging from classic movies to hit television series. The license includes such properties as The Wizard of Oz, A Christmas Story, Where the Wild Things Are, The Goonies, Gremlins, Little Shop of Horrors, Watchmen, Friday the 13th, A Nightmare on Elm Street, Mad Magazine, Friends, AND MORE! The first toaster is scheduled to be on sale September 2012.
These collector toasters will imprint iconic images from your favorite Warner Bros. films and television series onto slices of bread to make a fun impression on your breakfast, lunch or midnight snack! The extra-wide slots allow you to not only toast bread, but also bagels and more. UL tested and approved, it includes illuminated function buttons for cancel, reheat and frozen. The toaster design is a beautiful glossy black finish featuring the logo from the film or television series, and is a compliment to any counter top.
This makes a great gift for any fan of these classic films and TV shows! Once the timer dings, it's all fun with your Warner Bros. favorites right in the middle of your morning slice of toast. Collect them all, starting September 2012!"Dynamic Forces is excited to work with Warner Bros. Consumer Products to release these collectible image toasters that capture the spirit of some of Warner Bros.' most admired properties and timeless brands," states President of Dynamic Forces, Nick Barrucci. "We're thrilled to give fans the opportunity to interact with their favorite brands and characters in a new way."
Replies
Wow, you just can't make this (expletive deleted) up, can you?
WITH EXTREME APOLOGIES TO ALAN MOORE!
From Rorschach's Journal:
"I followed my nose. The smell of burnt wheat was quite pungent, even through the fibrous boundary of my mask. The tell tale odor led me to a gruesome discovery. Old McDonald was short one pig and would have a few less chicks to raise, all because some gluttonous, non-contributor to society was hungry".
...Would there be a setting to burn a Rorschach-like face/graphic upon the piece of bread ?
Would there be a tie-in Lollipop Line and " Lions 7 tigers !!! " a Friends Of Toastiness tie-in for the Oz one ???????
A Watchmen toaster!!! Ridiculous!!
Now a sugar bowl or wall-clock, that would work!
Amongst its other crimes against decency, the Watchmen toaster seems to have been photographed in the world's most boring office...
Figures.
I think a Rorschach toaster ought to put random impressions in the bread, so if you poured honey or melted butter on it, they'd form different shapes for each breakfaster.
Frankly they all look like the Darth Vader toaster
Andy
This really is mind-boggling, isn't it? I'd almost believe it's an early April Fool's joke.
I could almost believe that Warners is deliberately doing this in retaliation for Moore's anti-Before Watchmen statements. Why is there no Christopher Reeve Superman? Or a Michael Keaton Batman? Or Harry Potter? Those movies were far more marketable than Watchmen.
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